How extraordinary!
I didn't really think it was so special until, while waiting for a bus I was transported instantaneously to another plane of existence and it was then I realized that the sign spoke the truth.Is that person sitting next to you on the train just very short or actually a dwarf? Sorry for the blatant plagiarism of other works but I found it amusing.
If a cheeseburger costs $1 and a double cheesburger costs $2.50, why not just buy 2 cheesburgers?
Pop Quiz: Who used to order 2 Quarter-pounders , 2 large fries and a large Coke? The same person used to then lick the sauce from the crown of the Quarter-pounders and then stuff them with the fries before consumption.
Who used to clean piss soaked pizza from urinals on New Year's Eve while the rest of us were revelling?
Have you seen the episode of Family guy (or is it Robot Chicken) where the father pigeon is teaching it's son the art of choosing choice locations to drop turds in parks. The final, best location happens to be down the end of a divers snorkel. I seem to remember being involved in a similar debarkle, only the baby bird was me, the nugget of crap was from our pet drub and the snorkel was being used by Dodd in a 44 gallon drum filled with water. Art imitating life? I wonder what did end up happening to those ferrets? I'm pretty sure they weren't squashed flat in a tragic ramp collapse in an overcrowded Guinea pig apartment as was Bronski Beat.
At one time we had many pet mice. They co-existed together peacefully for a while and then ate each other.
Dodd, do you recall the sequence of events in this morbid tale, the names involved and the order of being eaten or have you clensed your mind of such things to avoid scarring your psyche?
posted by Dave Gee @ 11:18 pm
8 comments
8 Comments:
Dave, you are one twisted unit. By the way, the piss-soaked pizza dude was me. But there was another.
Random advice: Be very careful when coating hot toast with honey as the heat from the toast secretly warms the honey and makes it runnier than your initial viscosity assessment of the honey in the jar, resulting in a vein of warm, sticky fluid running down the hand and onto one's trousers (a strangely familiar situation).
The maccas order is Bags.I did the piss soaked pizza thing as well,once in the girls toilets at Mt Waverley pizza hut,some bitch took a dump on the toilet seat mr whippy style.Lovely.I would have to say that the men'a toilets smelled worse on a daily basis but when it came to the extreme stuff the women were way worse.Kurt,you agree?
I concurr - filthy bitches. That's why chicks' loos don't have urinals, because the mess they make needs to be contained in cubicles. I remember the turd event. Hadn't the offending stool been layed on the very back lip of the toilet seat, just to spite you? And to think we let them vote.
Didn't Scott do the same thing when he visited our house in Flemington many years ago? There was a log on the back of the toilet seat so we assumed he must have been sqouatting.
Yeah, I remember dragging him into the bathroom by the neck (his art school arms were no match for my zoo biceps at the time - a rare treat) to ask him to explain the dirty brown patch on the back of the toilet seat. His only reponse: guilty laughter.
Well, you could have always pulled out your 44 carbine and shown them who's boss
It was my goal at rutherglen to spit on every animal in the park. I think I got about a third of the way. That shitty little monkey Jimmy was so obnoxious, I saved the fat gorbies for him but he only feasted on them so I stopped.
As for the mice, can I jog your memory with names like Business slump, Military mouse and Big mama? And do you remember which mouse was the last one alive after eating it's last rival?
Hey Dave, I`m feeling kinda peckish. Wanna come over?
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